Thursday, August 25, 2011

Western Medicine Can't Save Me - Bring on the Hokum!

In the fall of 2010, I finally got a new job working for the county government.  I was happy to be working again – I’m not someone who enjoys NOT working.  I’ve been here for over a year and I’m pretty happy. It’s a job and a paycheck, but it sure would be nice to get a raise!

But anyway, all that is just background.  During the time I was unemployed, our family would go and do Disney for free – we’d go to DTD, watch Wishes from the Poly or TTC and dream about going back.  At some point while reading DisBoards, I learned about the Princess Half Marathon.  It sounded fun, but at over 200 pounds, with smoker’s lungs and a wonky cardio system, there was no way I’d be able to do it – I figured it was only for runners, anyway. I put it out of my mind and forgot all about it.  Also in 2009, since I had no job, I was able to go to the University of Florida’s homecoming parade. My daughter and I saw the runners from the Gator Gallop and I joked that maybe next year I’d run in that. Yeah right! 

One day in early 2011 at a meeting at work, one of my coworkers – who is over 40 and JUST had a baby a MONTH before, told me that she was going to be out of the office in a few weeks so that she could do the Princess.  I kind of looked at her and said to myself – “WTF? She’s running right after having a baby (and a C-Section, at that!)? What the hell excuse do YOU have, fat ass?”  After that, it kind of stayed in my head, as a ‘One Day’ kind of goal, but nothing I was seriously ready to go after yet.

2011 continued uneventfully until the end of summer.  (More background info – I have suffered migraines for decades).  I experienced an extremely debilitating headache that lasted for almost a week and I finally said Fuck It – I gotta find a doctor that will actually TREAT these things. I’ve been told many things from other doctors:  They aren’t that bad, you only get them because you are fat, take hot baths, bullshit like that. I’ve had doctors laugh at me when I told them I thought they were weather-related.

In August 2011, I went to my doctor’s office and saw a wonderful woman who was a headache sufferer herself and after she listened to me describe the hell I live with (and I cried a bit while explaining them because they have gotten that bad), she told me that she thought the majority of them were actually tension headaches!  She wrote me a prescription for a migraine med and for massage therapy. I was to go once a week for 6 weeks and report back to the doc.

Now, I know most of you don’t know me, but believe me when I say that I am a very LOGICAL person. I am a firm believer in Western Medicine. If it hurts, take a pill until it doesn’t hurt any more. If it’s broken, use tools and fix it. Massage, yoga, acupuncture, weird teas – this is not medicine. This is HOKUM. But, by this point, I was ready for hokum.  After a few days, I worked up the courage (yes, I was scared) and called the therapist she recommended. The lady had a funny name, which reinforced my idea of “hokum”.  I set up an appoint to go before work the next week.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I Am Announcing a Goal..... Slowly

One of the things they (who are ‘they’ anyway?) suggest that you when you are trying to reach a goal is to TELL EVERYONE your goal so that there is accountability.   

I’ve never wanted to do this because I’ve never felt like I’ve needed to. I also felt like I would be made fun of when the inevitable failure happened. Of course, I never felt like I was striving for something either. I have a few adult accomplishments under my belt - I’ve graduated college, gotten married, bought a house, had a child, quit smoking 5 years ago, bought a brand new car – but none of these feel like I’m striving towards something for ME.  I’m a wife and a mom and I think that I have let myself linger in the background for far too long.

A few years ago, I worked at a company that paid for a fitness boot camp.  I signed up for it and went religiously – there were only about 5 of us that did, including one great guy who we lost last year to cancer.  I lost about 15 pounds during that time, and was able to do 15 man pushups. I still couldn’t run for shit and my cardio system could barely keep up – I would get dizzy a lot.   Once the program was over, I tried to continue going to the YMCA to get on the elliptical or treadmill, but it was not the same. I didn’t get the same feeling that I did at the boot camp.   

Due to the economy and people not wanting things constructed, I was laid off in 2009. Because the Y was in the same neighborhood as the company, and was frequented by LOTS of people who knew both me and where I no longer worked, I didn’t want to go and have people give me the pity “so…. How ARE you doooooooooing?” crap.  I didn’t die – I got laid off. I don’t think I have set foot back in the Y since then.

During the time I was laid off, I sat on my ass either on the couch or in front of the computer - it was now my job to FIND a job. It was hell.  I became much more sedentary than before. I didn’t want to go anywhere or do anything.  The only upside is that throughout it all, I never did smoke or feel the need to smoke.

To be continued….

I WAS Lazy, but now I'm not...

Just a quick note to let everyone know that there is going to be a lot more action on this blog pretty soon!  I have a goal, I have a set date, and it involves NOT being lazy!

Stay tuned for the details!