After I volunteered at the Tom
Walker Half Marathon, I made sure to register for membership to the Florida
Track Club (FTC) so that I could take advantage of the FTC discount for the
upcoming Turkey Trot here in town. I’ve always been curious (and jealous) of
people who run on Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is for sleeping in and cooking,
not running!
But I decided to give it a try,
since it was pretty affordable for a 10k.
I was able to do packet pickup
in the days before the race, which was good. That takes some of the stress out
of the morning
.
.
Nicely packaged |
The Shirt |
Hubby, unfortunately, had to
work at 7:30, so I had to work around that.
When I woke on Thanksgiving
morning, it was 29*, according to The Weather Channel. Oh, Lord. I don’t know
if I can do this!
I ended up in tights, Sparkle
Skirt, base layer, tech tee, quarter-zip, BondiBand, fuzzy headwarmer from
Walmart and gloves. I was still cold.
When we got in the car, there
was ice on the windows, but the car said it was all the way up to 32*!
We joked about how stupid I was
to run in this while the car warmed up, and eventually the windows were clear enough for
us to drive, so I took him to work, then decided to stop at a local convenience
store for hot chocolate. That always warms me up!
Traffic was heavy as I waited to enter Tacachale.
When I got to Tacachale (where
the race was), I of course, had to pee.
I parked in the lot (near a guy getting dressed in a turkey suit),
walked across the (frosted) field and found the bathroom.
Traffic was heavy as I waited to enter Tacachale.
At least 10 cars at each turn signal, plus however many in my line |
He's a turkey, with a Santa Hat.... mmmm'kay |
Yes, that is frost, not sand - this means that my feet were soaked by the time I got to the start line |
As I’m walking to the start
line, I see no trash cans. After we start, I see no trashcans. Where the hell
are the trashcans! I look like a fatass,
walking a 10k with a cup of hot chocolate! But, because I’m a nice person, I
didn’t want to just chuck it in the grass…
So, after about only 5 minutes,
I was already last. It’s cold, my nose
hurts, and I’m behind three teenagers who keep looking back and giggling. I
already hate them.
Black Shirt, Grey Shirt and White Shirt = The Snots |
I walked a lot.
By Mile 1, I was dead last – so
last that the clean-up truck was behind me.
And the snot-noses were still in
front of me, moseying like they were at the mall.
Mile 1 - Deep in the woods |
Back off dude, I know I'm last |
Am I gonna get cancer from those? |
Getting to Mile 2, I was still
last. Still on the trail. Not a lot of sun could penetrate the heavy trees, so
I was still cold and snotty.
Right about 2 ½ miles, we got
our first water stop. There were about 3 people there. I think they looked
bored.
The Snots |
I love pavement! I wish it loved me and stuck around... |
Ugh, more ‘trail’. It was
basically a cleared-out area filled with pine straw. Very slippery stuff. Mile 3 was in this area, and I
was feeling good, even if I was pretty much last, doing a trail run when I‘ve
never trail run before. I puffed on the inhaler and kept pushing on.
On the other side of the fence is a Super Wal-mart, and bad neighborhoods |
Shine on! |
We come to the split point,
where the 5k goes one way and the 10k goes the other, and oh look, more ‘trail’
i.e. pine straw.
The Mile 5 marker was here, though,
so I was happy! So was a water stop, a little further up
.
I said something inane to the volunteers, then thanked them for being awesome and kept going.
.
I said something inane to the volunteers, then thanked them for being awesome and kept going.
I exited the Tunnel of Trail
into a large field that just had a bunch of stakes and orange tape marking the ‘course’.
It was very confusing, as the 5k went one way and the 10k went the other. My course went pretty straight across, then
back into the woods.
Can I just lay down in the grass and enjoy the sun? |
Once in the woods, there was
more orange tape, woven through trees and such.
There better not be any machete-wielding serial killers in these woods! |
The volunteers directing both
traffic AND me to the finish line were VERY cheerful and nice (unlike the skank at Mile 4 who told me
to hurry up so that cars could go by…).
Lots of clapping and cheers from them as I headed towards the finish
line.
Oh, and who do I hear behind me?
The Snots. As I run into the finish line, the guy decides to run in as well, trying to pass me. Really, bro? Really?!? Do
your balls feel a little bigger cutting the course and then trying to pass a fat girl in a skirt?
Screw you, cheater.
Besides almost being passed (I beat the guy by .091 seconds - The Snots came in last!), the finish
line was just a joke. There wasn’t anyone around cheering in any runners (yeah,
I know I was late, but still…) – Mary (a co-worker from a different department)
did throw out a Woo-Hoo for me, but I didn’t hear it apparently. My official time was 1:44:40.395. (The guy was 1:44:40.486)
And to add insult to injury of
this crappy race? NO MEDALS! To me, a 10k is a big deal. A medal would’ve
been nice! (Edit – I decided later that I’m going to take that medal I forgot I
had from the Tom Walker Half-Marathon and repurpose it into a Tacachale 10k
Turkey Trot medal.)
Anyway, I got my photo taken at
the Finish Line (that they were dismantling mere moments after I crossed…) and
went looking for refreshments. No bananas (I don’t eat them, but still…). I
didn’t see any bottled water, but there was GatorAde in the coolers, so I
grabbed a cup of that and watched the awards for a bit.
Here is my "Medal" for the Turkey Trot - Let's hear it for creativity and stickers! |
I'm so cool - hell, I'm so COLD! |
No comments:
Post a Comment