Sunday, August 23, 2015

Heat Stroke, Smeat Stroke - Tijuana Flats Summer Beach Run 2015

I got up early today to try to get the lawn mowed.  I have the worst time with our lawn.  I live in Florida. The grass grows in summer. It’s hot in summer. It rains in summer. The best time to mow the lawn in summer is in the morning. If it rained the night before, the grass is still wet in the morning. You aren’t supposed to mow wet grass.  If I can’t mow the lawn, the lawn grows taller. Taller grass holds water longer. See my conundrum?

So, it rained last night, but not a heavy rain, so I figured I’d give it a try. I did well for about 15 minutes until the mower got clogged and overheated, which caused the mower to shut off. I went inside, chilled out, had some water, came back out, tried again. No luck; overheated within minutes.

By this time, hubby was up, so he decided to try (because, you know, waving a penis at things makes it work better). He spent a good half hour scraping the wet crap from the deck, then mowed for about 15 minutes, then it overheated again. We called it quits and put the mower away. The lawn kept growing.

I sat down with some lunch – bacon and eggsand just messed around on the computer for a few hours.

We left the house around 2:45 and got to Jax Beach around 4:30.  I drove around a bit looking for parking, but we just ended up in the exact same parking spot as last year, across from a 7-Eleven.  I stopped in for a quick pottie (with a real, if someone questionable, toilet) before we all headed to pick up our packets. The Kiddo was going to run the mile this year!

Oh, thank heaven!
Packet pickup was much more organized this year, so that was definitely a plus!  No huge lines either… I think because we got there earlier. 

Lines are much shorter than last year
Looking towards Packet Pickup
After we bibbed up, we just kind of hung around under a half-erected tent. Yeah, it was hot under there, but better than having the crazy ass sun beat down on us!  

Gimme shelter
The tent was barely 6-feet tall
Ready to run!
I took lots of pics while we waited.

So. Many. Tortilla chips.
Live music. Local businesses.
Plenty of potties! Don't pee in the ocean!!
Ocean Spray PACt Water samples. I didn't get any.
Ready to run!
Only fitting to wear my "Waves" SparkleSkirt for this race!

Soon, I went and lined up, while Hubby and the Kiddo went to the other side of the start line. 

Behind the start line
Military group behind me
Luckily, it wasn’t nearly as windy as it was last year either!  I knew not to be too close to the water, too, so I could go through the chute instead of around it.

Okay, so it’s not windy, but it is hot as fuck today!  I don’t think “all out” is an option today. 

Foot selfie!
We took off, and hubby got a good shot of me coming out of the chute, and I passed them with a wave. 

I look so gay when I run!
I had two goals for this race – keep up my 1/1 intervals (or run longer than 1 minute), and to run aside the Military group for a total of 2 minutes. 

Guess what I'm doing?!?  I did the whole 2 minutes!!!!
Bye, guys! Thanks for letting me run with you!
Meanwhile, at the 1 Mile Fun Run, the kiddo took off, looking like she was a linebacker.
A gangly linebacker
Made it to Mile 1, still rocking my intervals. I decided to go ahead and keep trotting for a while. 

I'm happy with that Mile time. No "All Out" happening today!
The water stations on this race are mediocre – they are generally staffed by teenagers who don’t care very much.

Trotted to Mile 2 and decided to keep going. 

Here come my military guys!
Mile 2
I hit the turn-around and was beginning to feel really, like really, bloated and uncomfortable in the tummy/bowel area. 

We have to go BACK!
At Mile 3, I decided to walk for a bit. I was getting past uncomfortable; to, almost, in pain.  I occasionally tried to jog again, but my gut said no.  I was getting mad at this point.

Lonely at Mile 3
Still walking at Mile 4, and ticked off that I hurt so much.  I was pissed that I hurt. I was pissed that I was so far behind. I was pissed that I couldn’t see the finish line.  Even knowing I had less than a mile to go didn’t make it any better. 

Mile 4
Finally, though, I finished.  My official time was 1:28:48 – I actually PRd this race by about 30 seconds!  That took away some of that pissed-off-edness. Yes, that’s a word.

At the finish line, I was again given a card, because there were no medals left. However, after a few minutes, hubby noticed that another group of volunteers had medals left, so I exchanged my card for a medal.

Great medal this year!
I chugged my PowerAde while hubby and I watched the Kiddo, an almost-full-grown woman, play in the ocean.  She did her mile in about 18.5 minutes, but because she’s overweight (shocker), it’s August and she’s not trained at all, she pushed herself way too hard and was really uncomfortable. So hubby told her to go hop in the waves to cool her body down.  When I finished, she’d been there for about an hour…

Ah, screw it! I waded in myself, sneakers and all, for a few minutes, and it cooled me down a bit too.

After getting out, we took a fun pic of me and the kiddo, then headed to the Tijuana Flats booth. All of us asked for basic tacos (meat and cheese), but because they were trying to move super-fast, the Kiddo’s taco ended up having beans on it. I gave her mine, since I was still feeling really shitty. I’m thinking it was heat exhaustion. I don’t think I made it all the way to heat stroke, though. 

So much sand in her SparkleSkirt...
While the family was eating their tacos (they were tasty, my body just refused), I laid down in some nearby shaded grass to try to cool down and lengthen my back – I was feeling very “humpy”.  I think this is called Corpse Pose, or Shavasana, if you’re talking about yoga.  I just call it lying down on my back with my arms and legs all spread out. It felt okay.

Even while laying down, I was breathing heavily, and still felt unable to eat anything (I was nauseated, but NOT, at the same time).  Hubby said my face was really red.

After getting up, but before we left, hubby gave my free beer coupons to the military guys near us; I don’t drink, and they busted their ass (in many, many ways) – I think they deserve an extra beer!

We walked back to 7-Eleven, and used their bathrooms again, this time to change. While the kiddo was changing, I made hubby buy me some soda. Soda is the quickest way to mainline sugar and caffeine.  I got a 16oz can of Dr. Pepper and a 16oz can of Pepsi.  Seriously, 16oz CANS of soda. They reminded me of cheap beer… I felt so pimp. 

It ain't a 40, but it'll do
We went to Sonic for dinner, as I was feeling somewhat better at this point. Hubby and the kiddo got cheeseburger meals. I just got some chicken fingers and a large Dr. Pepper (yes, in addition to those two pimp cans.)

My Pimp-si wanted to order a milkshake
Unfortunately, my body rejected the chicken, although I was able to eat a few fries. We drove home via US-90 to I-295 (which is one of the reasons we chose to find a restaurant on Beach Blvd).  Last year, traffic getting on to 295 from this area was HORRIFFIC!  Like, I was still jittery from the traffic adrenaline when I got home.  This time was much calmer. I’ll have to remember this in the future!

We got home around 11, and I would be lying if I thought I wasn’t asleep before 11:30. 

As of this morning, I still feel like hot buttered ass, but I think I realllllly overdid it yesterday!

Location: Jacksonville Beach
Host: (Who put on the race) JTC Running
Race Fee: $25 ($12 for One Mile)
Packet Pickup: MUCH more organized than last year (or was I earlier)?
Parking: Not a lot of parking in beachside area, we got lucky again next to 7-Eleven
Support: (on-course) Teenagers manning water stations, not the best. 4 Water stops.
After Party: Band, free beer, Tijuana Flats Tacos and Nachos