Total Eclipse Vacation Day 8 (Stone Cold Donut Catcher)

If you missed Day 7 of our Total Eclipse Vacation, you can catch up HERE

I woke up this morning sad... Today is the day we leave and go home. While this vacation wasn't quite what I had planned (I mean, who plans for sinus headaches and congestion?), it was worth every single annoyance and aggravation for the experience we were able to have, viewing a total solar eclipse. 

Last night, as we drove back from Redmon's, I told Hubby that I wanted to do most of the packing because I had a plan to spread everything around (combine my leftovers and his leftovers into a single suitcase, put the dirty laundry into the other suitcase, and pack the personal bags carefully so that nothing gets lost or spilled). 

Yeah, that didn't happen. As soon as he got out of bed, he went into overdrive and started stuffing everything willy-nilly into the suitcases and personal items... Well, so much for that idea (we're lucky he didn't pop any freakin' seams with how much he stuffed into the freakin' bags!). Once the bags were 'packed' I realized that you can take the girl out of the road trip, but you can never take the road trip out of the girl... We had too many snacks and souvenirs, and not enough room to pack them! We left behind a lot of the chips and Little Debbies, I chugged down the last 20oz of orange juice in the fridge, and still ended up with 4-5 bottles of soda and water that we brought with us (we drank a few, but gave the rest to the Avis staff when we turned in the SUV). Hubby shoved the Crown Candy purchases into his bag (some didn't survive as well as we'd hoped). I shoved the popcorn and Wally's chips into my personal item (those got smashed by the TSA gal). 

Check out wasn't until 10am, but we were ready to go by 9:45 (again, we would have had plenty of time to be slower in packing, darling). The weather for today looked questionable - lots of grey skies all the way to Memphis. Plus, the flight home was supposed to be pretty rough, so I'll definitely need the Dramamine tonight!

We drove over to Memphis (this time on the interstate, stupid Garmin) and our first stop of the day: Gibson Donuts. I was expecting something like an old diner, or a dingy Mr. Donut kind of place, and yeah, it was kind of dingy, but in a well-loved, been-there-forever kind of way. It was run by a staff of people young enough to be my children, and seemed to serve every demographic imaginable. Seeing him looking overwhelmed, many different patrons suggested to Hubby that we try a maple bacon donut. We each got two - he got a Maple Bacon and a Cream Puff (yeast donut filled with buttercream, frosted with chocolate, more cream on top, and glitter!). I went with a Maple Bacon and a Cinnamon-Sugar raised. 

Cream Puff

Maple Bacon

Cinnamon Sugar

As we were at the register, one of the staff members asked if we'd ever been there before. We said no, and the next thing I knew, they were getting ready to throw donuts at us! Apparently, they throw glazed donuts at newbies. 

Now, I am usually a pretty low-profile, laid-back kinda gal. I don't showboat, or brag about myself or toot my own horn, but y'all... They threw a donut at me and without even flinching, I just raised my RIGHT HAND and caught it like the badass that I am. (For those who don't know, I am left-handed). It was just amazing, and everyone went crazy (I don't think they expected me to catch it). So then, the guy looked over my shoulder at Hubby, tossed his in the air, and I CAUGHT THAT ONE TOO! Like just left hand, up in the air, bitch that's my donut kind of catch. The entire staff went wild! Someone said I snatched that MF out of the air like Stone Cold Steve Austin. I won't lie... I felt so cool, hehe. 

I think Hubby fell in love with me all over again that day, he was so impressed! They threw another one at him (I let him catch that one), while I cleaned off my hands and paid for our donuts - under $8 for four donuts and a can of root beer! Although the glazed ones were free, so really six donuts. 

A little worse for wear, after being caught by a badass!

The Maple Bacon was good, with a light chewy dough and supple maple flavor; I think the bacon was out of a bag, but it was still really good. The Cinnamon Sugar donut messed with me, because I'd take a bite expecting a 'regular' sugar donut (Sugar Raised, if you're an old school Dunkin' Donut fan); the cinnamon threw it out of whack. The squished and decimated glazed donut was delicious, with something different in the glaze... maybe honey? His Cream Puff was delicious as well. 

As we sat there, we just people-watched, and my goodness... they were never not busy. You saw everyone from beloved "old man" regulars, to teachers, to rich women, to everyone in between. Many people had called in orders and were seen carrying out at least a dozen or more donuts. None of the people we saw only got one donut. 

They also had many tee-shirts for sale, and I really wish I'd picked one up. I love specialty tee shirts, and what a great way to add to my collection and support this place that I'll probably never go to again, right? 

Stuffed to the gills with three donuts and a can of root beer in my belly, Hubby had to roll me outta there, but our next stop was a good old-fashioned game or two of putt-putt golf. 

As you can imagine, it wasn't all that busy on a Wednesday morning with rain in the forecast. There was only one other family when we got there (and of course, we ended up getting stuck behind them!) We asked the cashier what was the most economical way to play at least 2 rounds of golf, and she gave us the Wacky Wednesday Special - Unlimited mini-golf plus a box of popcorn plus a soda plus a $5 arcade credit... all for $15 each! Oh hell yeah, what a deal! 

We got our balls and clubs and played the first course (the Easy course) - not a lot of "Goofy" here, just a plain course with some hills and basic obstacles. Although, because of recent rains, the AstroTurf was saturated and slow. I spent way too much time randomly jumping up and down on the green to make splashes! We never keep track of strokes, so no idea who won any of the rounds (it was probably me, though... wink wink). 

We moved on to the second course (the Medium course), and it started to sprinkle while we were on the first hole, then began to really start raining when we were about halfway through. We debated quitting, but it's just rain, and most of this course was under tree canopy anyway. 

When we finished, we headed inside to use up our arcade credits. I'm sad to say that my Skee-Ball skills have disappeared since I was a kid, and every round, Hubby got more points than I did. Maybe it had something to do with my changing vision, due to the Lasik I had last year... At the Prize Counter, we pooled our tickets (I think we ended up with about 300), to get me a weird little squishy toy, a few Cow Tales, and two Dum-Dums. That little squishy toy now hangs from my bedroom lamp and he makes me smile every time I see him. 

He's supposed to be a lion, I think

At this point it was pouring outside, so we picked up our two boxes of popcorn and two sodas (and she gave us the cool souvenir cups, even though the "deal" was for the smaller Styrofoam cups... Unfortunately, no room in the luggage for the souvenir cups, so they had to be trashed, unfortunately). The popcorn was delicious, fresh, and super-salty. We sat in the little snack area and watched this absolute jackwagon out back on the "real golf" driving range just absolutely suck at what he was doing. He wasn't being spatially aware of others around him, he was swinging badly, not taking turns when others next to him wanted to drive... I think we saw 7 different people leave while we were watching. 

The rain let up so we took the soda cups to the car, then came back to do Course 3 (the Hard course), where I got a Hole in One on the very first hole. Oh yeah! Obnoxiously goofy Hole in One dance had to happen, and I'm sure the traffic driving by got a kick out of it. I got Holes in One on two other holes, for a total of three. He got none. Not on any of the courses. One more dance with an added butt wiggle, just for him. 

We chose not to play any more since it was still raining, and I headed to our next stop: Lunch at Cook-Out. In a pretty sketchy part of town, really... and a pretty sketchy Cook-Out, to be honest. The entire floor was an ice skating rink from tiles mopped with a greasy mop. We were the only ones inside, except for one staff member on their lunch break. Hubby got a Burger tray with double fries. I got a Corn Dog with cheese bites & Cajun fries (which, sadly was just regular fries with seasoning... I thought they'd be more like Checker's fries). The cheese bites were bomb, though (yes, I said bomb). Though, to be honest, we should have waited a while... between the donuts and the popcorn, neither of us were super-hungry, which meant that we had no room for milkshakes. 

While we ate, we tried to think of something else to do, to fill the time between lunch and getting to the airport, but because of the weather, we thought it a better idea to just gas up the SUV and get to the airport early. It would give us plenty of time to turn in the car and make sure it's all cleaned out. We can relax through TSA, then find somewhere quiet to sit (like an out of the way corner or lounge) and then move over to our gate as we got closer to our departure time. 

I have to say, returning the SUV was super-easy! I just had to pull in to the Return Area and leave the keys in it. As we were unpacking, someone came over to check the mileage and do a body check. We gave the Avis employees all of our leftover bottles of water and soda, then headed in to the airport. 

Because Memphis doesn't have a lot of pre-TSA seating areas, we went ahead through, and both of us got dinged again! After we flew in last week, he'd tucked the tiny bottle of water into his carry on and apparently forgot about it (and of course, it's more than 3oz). My personal item was pulled out for my laptop - she ran a weird little wand over the entire thing, and it made me wonder what in the world she was testing for? What did my laptop touch that it was registering as something potentially unsafe? Is this normal? Thanks to her pawing through my bag (which I'd packed very well), my bag of Wally's chips were completely crushed by the time I got home. The popcorn survived better. 

On the other side of TSA, we looked for a quiet place to chill. Originally, I thought that we could go over to the other side of the terminal, where the international departures were, but it looked pretty deserted, and I didn't want to get in trouble. So instead, we stayed in our side of the terminal, and I found what seemed to be an empty and quiet gate (I read the board and I thought that this flight had already departed, and it would be a while before the next batch of travelers trickled over). But man, I was wrong! Soon, we were surrounded by a group called Sojourn Project (who were returning home after an amazing-looking journey through Civil Rights history, according to their website), with tons of high schoolers and their chaperones. Imagine, 100 free-range, driving-age teenagers just being kids, and all of the noise and energy that entails. Not that they were rowdy or overly rambunctious, but it was just... more tiresome... than I wanted to deal with. I was hoping for a quiet hour or so with my book and few distractions. Instead, it was crowded and loud. Everyone was eating something, so there was this weird odor of Chinese Chick-fil-A Pizza Coffee in the air. Standing up, sitting down, hollering to their friends, running over to where their friend is, talking on the phone, all the things that teenagers typically do... I just wanted a little peace, but I didn't want to look like a douche and leave (like, I don't like being near you so I'm moving seats). We only had to deal with them for an hour or so, so it wasn't terrible. 

Once they all departed, we moved closer to our gate (over in a corner). I moved some things around in my suitcase to make more room in my personal item bag. I took two Dramamine and put them in my pocket, then tucked the container in my suitcase - I planned to take them about 30 minutes before we got on the plane. A few minutes later, the gate agent offered free gate-checking since the plane was full, and you know I took advantage of that! No having to worry about overhead bin space or rolling them through Atlanta? And saving almost $100 to boot? Yes please! 

Eventually it was time to board, me at the window, and Hubby in the middle seat, with an aisle seatmate who (I learned later) was also a first-time flyer and having a few issues. I was curious if this flight would be better or worse. We flew in first thing in the morning, no issues. Will it be worse to fly at night? More delays? Worse weather? More nausea? Knowing this info will help me plan future flights. On both ATL-MEM flights, we were on the same plane, in the same area (Row 32 vs Row 33). I was on the left on the way up, and on the right on the way home. Both planes had the same shitty overhead fans that didn't do squat, that's for damn sure! 

Take-off was powerful, and at first I was feeling confident, no issues. It was cool to see the ground below us, all lit up with headlights and streetlights. But after about 10 minutes, I began to feel... off. I wondered if this was due to all the junk I ate today? Was I dehydrated? Lingering effects of my cold/sinus infections? Whatever it was, it was hitting me hard. I was sweating, it felt so hot on the plane - I'd brought a thick Shacket with me to wear on the plane both times, but I certainly didn't need it right now... Hubby had his jacket on too, so I was just surrounded by HOT. And bless his heart, he kept trying to show me funny memes and videos from Imgur (to distract me), but after the millionth half-hearted "heh" from me, he gave up. The attendant came by with snacks, and I got water and Sunchips. Sadly, at some point, I dropped the chips on the floor, never to be seen again. I tried to drink the water, but it didn't do much for me. Guess it's not dehydration. Also, Hubby was holding on to my water bottle that was full of ice cold water for me. By the time the attendant passed by, I had the safety card out and I was just fanning myself like a whore in church... I could feel... things... bubbling in my gut. Oh no... please, for the love of all that is good and holy, please please PLEASE do not allow me to vomit on this plane. There is no bag (though I found it later, and it was nasty), and I didn't want to vomit on my shirt or on the floor. No, please god, NO!

The fanning intensified as the weather - and the nausea - continued to get worse. Finally - finally - as I began to feel things rising in my chest, about bra band level, we touched down on the ground, and sweet Jesus of mercy, things began to drop back down in my throat. Honestly, I feel like I was about 2 minutes away from vomiting all over the floor! I was exhausted. I felt like I'd just run a marathon. I was sweaty and everything was spinning and all I could do was just sit there and exist in the space for a while. 

And bless his heart, Hubby was offering me my water, asking if I was okay, and being the best husband a girl could ever ask for. I just closed my eyes and laid my head on the side of the plane, fanning for my life. 

Once we got to our gate, our seatmate (who had a hard time himself, according to Hubby) jumped out into the aisle to stand up, and there was enough wiggle room for me to ask Hubby to help me take my shacket off, and dear lord, it was like twenty degrees cooler once I did that! I still felt woozy but not nearly as bad. Eventually, it was cleared enough that we could deplane, and I felt like an invalid, walking slowly out of the gate, and slowly over to the Plane Trane to catch our next flight. We only had 50 minute layover, but thankfully our second plane was delayed by 10 minutes or so. 

Once at our gate, I hauled ass across the walkway to the bathroom and then to the store next to it to pick up some ginger ale. I gave absolutely no fucks about how expensive it might be... It could have been ten bucks for all I cared! I gladly would have paid that, but surprisingly, it was only $3.29, and honestly? That's cheaper than at Disney World! I sipped on the ginger ale while we waited for our next plane, taking deep cleansing breaths, hoping like hell that things would be better on the next flight, trying to figure out why the heck this flight was so bad this time?!

Because we were there before our plane was, we were able to get on at the normal time, so it was easier to find our seat, get situated, find overhead space, etc. I had my ginger ale and bottle of water. I had my phone. I had NO jacket on (but kept in on my lap). I had the best husband ever. I could do this! The pilot came over the speakers and basically said, "...so, uh, yeah... there's some serious weather up there, so this flight is gonna suck, folks. Just so you know. Hunker down." Okay, maybe not exactly what he said, but that's the gist of it. So I hunkered down. Closed my eyes. Fan on full blast. sipped on ginger ale. Told myself over and over, I got this. 

And you know what?

I did. 

It was a terrible flight. I had to squeeze Hubby's hand a lot (he told me later it was like I was in labor again). I kept my eyes closed and tried to just rest, using my shacket as a pillow against the window. 

But I never got sweaty. I never got dizzy. And I never got the "Oh, puke's coming!" feeling, like I did on the first one. The ATL-GNV flight, despite the weather, seemed easier than the MEM-ATL flight, and I'm so thankful for that! And god bless these flight attendants... They held it together during some nasty weather, and were still smiling as we all deplaned. We let everyone else off the plane first so I wasn't holding anyone up, and then limped my way down the aisle. One of the attendants wished me a good night and asked if I'd seen the lightning during the flight? No, I didn't see the lightning, Mary... I was trying not to puke. But damn, I sure wish I HAD seen it! 

That was one of my greatest regrets... I was so shaken up that I couldn't look out the window at any time to see if I could see the ground, or watch the plane slowly lower in the air, or bank, or any of that. I wanted to see the rivers of taillights as we came into Atlanta over the beltway, and I wanted to see The Swamp, if we flew over UF campus... Instead I got furrowed brows and hand cramps. Oh well... I didn't puke on my shoes, so it's still a win.

As we walked toward baggage claim, I mumbled again about how I wanted to figure out what was so different between the two days (like a Pro and Con list kind of thing). Hubby propped me up against a wall to watch the two Personal Item bags then went to wait for our suitcases.  

As I stood there, breathing deeply, I put my hands in my pockets to make sure that I had all my random stuff and...

What is that...?

Are. You. Fucking. KIDDING ME!!???!!??!?!

I pulled out two beautifully perfect little Dramamine pills, just waiting for me. I just laughed internally and put them back in my pocket until Hubby came back. I said to him, "remember how I wanted to figure out what was so different between the two days?" and then pulled out the pills to show him. 

 

Okay, but let's put a spin on this... I survived and didn't puke on two separate flights that flew through some nasty turbulence, at night, with no Dramamine. It's a win, right? Like, yay for me, but I never want to do that again. 

With a big sigh, we gathered up our belongings and rolled our way to the car (which seemed a lot further away than it did when we parked last week). Back at home, hubby unpacked the car and we both just crashed in bed. I think I was asleep in 5 minutes! We joke about how we love our (generic) TempurPedic mattress and MyPillow pillows, but my god, it was like sinking into a cloud tonight. 

What an adventure! 

When's the next one?