It's my Birthday, I'll Kayak If I Want To!

I like to think I'm not easily influenced, but over the past few years, the idea of kayaking has become more and more appealing. An old co-worker got new kayaks for her birthday last year. A lot of the folks on YouTube that I watch often go kayaking, and frankly... I just really wanted to do it. But Hubby isn't a water baby, so I had to find a way to do it on a Me Day.  

Enter Labor Day, my birthday weekend. Hubbin would be at work on Labor Day, so why not take a day for me and just do it? If it sucked, it sucked, and I'd never have to do it again. So I began to plan a Me Day. My day looked like this:

• Mystery Shop a car wash in Ocala (for $25 plus reimbursement!)
• Pick up donuts at Tas-T-O's Donuts
• Kayak
• Have lunch
• Shop
• Drive Home

About a week before my day, however, I got a call from my mom and she wanted to visit for my birthday. So I invited her to come kayaking. She wasn't up for that (she is elderly), but was okay with meeting for lunch afterward. 

So Monday morning, I took hubby to work, picked up a Sausage Biscuit for the road and made my way to Ocala. When I got to the car wash I was assigned to Mystery Shop, the car wash was broken! So that was a waste of time (still got paid, though!) that I could have spent getting delicious donuts. By the time I got over to Tas-T-O's (at about 9am), the majority of their case was empty! 

Pickin's are pretty slim at this point

What a full window looks like at 5am

I chatted up a few locals who told me that if you don't get there by 7 or 8am, all the good stuff is gone. I was able to score a cake donut, and it was heavenly. A great crumb, the right texture, and oodles of glaze on the outside. I definitely want to hit up this place again (but when in the world will I be there at 7am?)

From there, I drove over to Silver Springs, and my date with a kayak. I had reserved a Sit-On Kayak for an hour for about $35 after fees and taxes. I had to also pay park entrance to Silver Springs State Park ($5). Once I signed a waiver, I gave them my car keys to secure my kayak. I was given a lanyard with safety instructions. I picked up a life vest (not required to wear but to have on-board) as well as a paddle, and then I got my kayak at the launch. 

Holy moly, it was busy! I was in line to check-in for probably 20 minutes, the whole time I'm looking around at what had to be Church Van levels of crowds. So many teenagers! The launch area was clogged with teenagers who had already gotten in the water and were waiting for their friends; the check-in area was clogged with teenagers who didn't know their friends were already in the water! Eventually they all figured it out, and I took a few extra minutes to let the crowds disperse, because frankly... I didn't want to look stupid getting in to my kayak! I had absolutely NO idea what I was doing, and the fewer bystanders to see me flounder, the better. 

It was awkward to get in and as soon as I sat down, a gush of cold spring water hit my ass and flooded the kayak; apparently these types of kayaks had a little 'overflow' valve or something in the bottom of the boat, and I was immediately drenched. The entire seating area of the kayak was under 2-3 inches of water! The staff member said that this was normal and not to worry. I wasn't worried, per se, but I was damn sure glad that I had the forethought to put all of my gear in a drybag! 

Anyway, I pushed off, using the paddling techniques I'd learned yesterday, via 10 minutes of YouTube videos, then kind of 'pulled off to the side' to settle myself a bit. I wanted to pull out my GoPro and set it up, but there was nowhere to clip it, so I had to jerry-rig a way to hold it up via a selfie stick (I should have brought the chest harness, really). 

Once I was all situated, I got back out on the paddling trail and just... drifted. With no crowds around me now, it was peaceful and quiet. Birds chirping. Small splashes from fish and turtles. Once in a while someone else would pass me, gliding through the water. I can totally understand why people like this so much! I was in heaven. I love the natural parts of Florida, especially the interior portions (sorry, Beaches, you're not the best part of the state!). Deep, thick, green woody areas with clear blue springs... it's heaven! 

After a little bit (no idea how long), I came to the end of the Fort King Waterway, and onto the actual Silver River. Now, Florida had just been hit by Hurricane Idalia, as a Category 3, near the Big Bend area. I don't know if that had anything to do with this or not... but DAMN! The current on the Silver River was much more than I was expecting. Also, I admit that I didn't do my due diligence and get familiar with the map and the paddling route... See, when I came out of the FKW, there were tons of people on the river! Canoes, kayaks, stand-up paddleboards, everywhere. It looked like people were coming out of a break in the bank on the other side of the river. So I just assumed that I had to cross the river to get over there. Well, as you can imagine, the current in the middle of the river was very, very fast (okay, maybe I overexaggerate, but it wasn't the slow and sensuous drift I'd just left). I had to put a lot of oomph in to it! And every time I stopped to take a break, I felt like I was just sliding further downstream. But finally, I made it all the way over to the other side!

Fort King Waterway Map (Courtesy of Florida Paddle Notes)

And wouldn't you know it... I didn't need to be over here! All of the other people I'd been in the vicinity of while paddling the FKW was staying on the left side of the river, happily making their way upstream... What was I doing over here? So, I pumped my way back across the river. My arms are just dying at this point, as well as my lungs. Also, for some reason, I thought that I'd only need to be on the river for maybe 5 minutes (again, didn't look at the silly map), so it felt like the river just kept going and going! I definitely wasn't prepared for how long I was going to need to paddle as hard as I did. 

Thankfully, I made it to the actual Silver Spring without losing myself to the current, and I slipped back into the FKW to return to the launch. I originally wanted to spend more time paddling around the springs area, but by this time, my 1-hour return time was coming up, and I didn't want to get penalized for returning it late (and having to pay extra!) My paddle back wasn't nearly as relaxing because as you got past the boardwalk that crossed over the waterway, you ran into the people who were going out toward the springs, and felt like rush-hour traffic. Everyone coming back in, like me, was instructed to kind of queue up as much as possible, to allow for new people to launch out. I kept getting bonked by a father/son canoe who proceeded to give me dirty looks every time it happened! As we sat there, I saw that one of the employees had cleared the launch-in point, and was waving us over. Well, since I wasn't lying down in my boat (like both of them were) and I was actually paying attention to what was going on, I was able to paddle over there quickly and get out. They saw me going and shot me the nastiest look, but who cares! 

Getting out was a thoroughly awkward experience, though! I was at an incline, since it was a boat ramp, and I just couldn't get my feet under me, so the employee gave me a hand to help me out, and bless his heart, I almost pulled him in with me! But I was able to get my legs under me finally, and I hopped out, thanking him for his assistance, of course! I headed back to the check-in desk to swap out my lanyard for my car keys, then dripped my way to my car. Once there, I changed clothes and headed to Long John Silver's for lunch with Mom and my aunt. We'd agreed to meet at 12pm, but when I got there a bit late, I didn't see their car. So I parked and texted her that I was there. And waited. And waited! After 20 minutes or so, I began to worry, so I texted again, but no response. About 10 minutes later, I look up to see my aunt walking toward me... They parked on the other side if the building after I'd already parked, and for some reason, she didn't get any of my texts, nor did I get any of hers! So they'd been here for probably 45 minutes waiting for me! We enjoyed our uber-greasy fish and shrimp and chicken as I told them about my trip, both of them wistfully saying gee, I wish I could do that, and me saying well, why the hell can't you? You're only as old as you act! (It's been 6 months since that discussion, and both are still in the I wish stage, no matter how many times I suggest we all go do it... sigh.) 

After lunch, the two of them headed out for some quality Thrift Shop Hoppin' while I needed to get on the road and head home to pick up hubby. On the way there, I stopped to pick up some groceries, as well as my birthday cake. 

So.... Let's take stock of how I'm feeling today. 

My body doesn't hurt nearly as much as I was expecting. Kayaking is really an ab-focused sport more than an arm-focused sport, so I definitely felt some fatigue there. A bit tired in my arms, too. But all in all, I felt wonderful! I certainly didn't feel like a 46-year old woman who just spent all morning kayaking!

I now totally understand why people love kayaking (as a relaxing sport, not a crazy "wild water rapid" sport). It's like taking a walk in the woods, but on water. It's chill. It's beautiful. It's relaxing. You get to experience nature from a different perspective. 

I'm so ready to do it again! Maybe next time I'll plan to do an entire day! I'll launch from the same place, and then go all the way down the river to Ray Wayside Park (they'll shuttle me back to the parking lot). I think that's only $55 or something... totally affordable for a full day trip! If I can swing it (and the weather cooperates), maybe I'll aim for the warmer end of winter (like February or March) in hopes of spotting Florida Manatees living their best mermaid lives in the river. 

And I'll leave a lot earlier so I have a fighting chance to get some of those donuts, too!

We Have a VRBO - Annual Eclipse Planning 2024

We did it, we've finally decided where we want to watch the 2024 Total Eclipse...

Drum roll, please!

Jonesboro, Arkansas!

Yay... uh... huh... okay...

Okay, I hear you... Why the hell did you choose Jonesboro, Arkansas? It's not metropolitan. It's not hustling and bustling... It's just... Arkansas. (No shade to Arkansanians... Arkansavites... Arkansans!)  

And I get that. Let me explain how we settled on Jonesboro.

We kicked around the idea of west Texas, but we've already been to Texas and we wanted something different. We thought about Poplar Bluff, Missouri, simply because of the fact that I follow YouTubers who live in PB, and it was in the path (shoutout to The Endless Adventure!) I even kicked around the idea of going way northeast to New York or Vermont.

But after looking at locations, and what was nearby, cost of flights and travel, and what average weather looked like in early April, I thought that Poplar Bluff was the best option. 

But we waited way too long to decide on a VRBO and options were disappearing quickly. We narrowed it down to a few locations, including a gorgeous cabin and an over-the-top disco ball of a house. I pushed hard for the cabin, but Hubby wanted the other one; he thought that there was "too much new stuff" happening (flying AND going to a new state AND being out in the woods all secluded); he was more comfortable with a "normal" house within city limits. Plus the quirkiness of the Disco Ball House was too fun to pass up. So I went ahead and booked it.   

Sadly, I got an email from the property owner pretty quickly, telling me that the property was not available - she'd forgotten to block off the date after the same days were booked via AirBnB. Luckily, the refund process was pretty quick and easy. 

So now, I needed to find a different city location, within the path of totality. I pushed again for the cabin, but he talked me into skipping it in favor of a city location by sweet talking me into a winter vacation in the mountains next year, maybe something near Branson. 

I went back to my spreadsheet (of course) and reviewed the choices that were left, and we decided on Jonesboro Retreat Near Arkansas State University, a mid-century home right in the middle of Jonesboro. A big selling point is that it had a great big backyard from which we could watch the eclipse without having to go find an open area. No snafus with the reservation; it was through a company called Evolve, which took a certain amount due as a down payment, and the remainder will be due about a month before we travel. 

So I'm happy to say that I have two of three big parts of our vacation taken care of. VRBO is reserved, and rental car is reserved. We still need to book flights, which can't really be done until January or February of next year. Until then, it's time to make plans for what other things to do while we're up there, and where to eat! 

(Future Lazy here... about a week before we left, I was telling my boss about my plans and she wistfully said, "You always take the vacations the rest of us dream about taking! They're so thought out and detailed!" Well, yeah... I'm crazy like that, with the planning and the spreadsheets and the reservations... and the balls to go and do it! Life's too short to simply dream about doing something!)

It's Not, Like, CANCER Cancer... Full Body Check and Results

Oh, the fun just never ends around here in 2023. So far we've had skinned knees, failed 15ks, cysts, appendicitis, and a myriad of plumbing & home problems. Join me now, as I tell you of more shit that has piled on to this horrible, not-so-good year...

As I mentioned in the cyst post, I had also made an appointment for a Full Body Check, since I'm a moley gal. I haven't had one done in quite a while, so it was way past time. I headed back to the same Dermatologist that I saw before. She asked if there were any that had been giving me issues, as well as asking if there were any that I wanted removed. I asked if she could remove one under my left breast (always irritated by my bra band), but told her to remove any others that looked like they should be removed. 

As I stood there in my tiny panties (ugh), she checked all my bits and circled a few that she wanted to take off - underboob, right arm, back left and upper back right. Within seconds, it seemed like, she pumped me full of (non-painful) Lidocaine and began slicing me up with a simple razor blade. I was bandaged up within a few minutes more, and told that I would hear back in a few days with my lab results. I went ahead and made another appointment for 2024 so that I don't let this task get away from me again (and I'm already making a mental note of what moles I want removed!)

TOP: Underboob, Right Arm, Both Back Locations
BOTTOM: Upper Back, Subsequent Stitches
Yep, those are my boobs and my rolls... congratulations to you for seeing 'em!

I got an email with my results a few days later, and 75% of it was good. 

• Underboob is an Intradermal Melanocytic Nevus. 
• Right Forearm is an Irritated Compound Nevus; benign mole associated with pigmented parakeratosis. 
• Back, Lower Left is a Lentiginous Compound Melanocytic Nevus; also associated with dermal nevus cells and pigmented parakeratosis.
• Back, Upper Right is an Atypical Nevus with Moderate Atypia; sample showed a proliferation of melanocytes arrayed singly and forming nests along the sides and bases of elongated ad focally anastomosing rete ridges with lamellar fibroplasia of the subjacent papillary dermis. Nests of similar-appearing melanocytes are also positioned in the superficial dermis. 

I know, I know, that's a whole lot of sciency talk. But basically, it boils down to three 'normal' moles and one precancerous mole. Because of that, I get to go back in a few weeks to have my upper back area excavated to have the dysplastic nevus area removed. 

So, for the past few days, I just can't get out of my own head. I know it's not a big deal... I don't have CANCER cancer, I just have a questionable mole. But when they start swinging around the word precancerous, all you hear is the cancer part... I feel this weird sense of dread, like this will be the 1 in a 100 chance that I do get the cancer, that it's worse than they thought. I keep sighing heavily, and my heart feels like it's dropping to my stomach every five minutes. I've dealt with precancerous moles before, way back when The Kiddo was a toddler, and I don't remember having these reactions back then. I'm probably just over-reacting, since it's just another fucking thing piled on top of all the other fucking things since March!! All I want to do is crawl into bed, pull the covers over my head, snuggle up with Hubby and cry. And if I asked him to do that, he would gladly oblige me. But I don't want to put that stress on him, while he's still dealing with his own issues. So for now, I'll suck it up, get the extra part removed, and take it one day at a time until I get an all clear. 

June 14th, I went back in, they numbed me up again and took a good triangle-shaped part of skin out of my back. I had to have a stitch put in since the excision area was large, and in a place where the skin couldn't heal easily, which of course meant that I'd have to come back to have the stitches removed and deal with yet another scar on my torso! 

I got my results two days later, and thank God, they took enough that there is no residual dysplastic nevus, and all the margins are free of involvement. Big nerd speak for, it's all gone. 

I know you're bummed, but I don't really have any Before and After photos for you. But I wanted to share this one little tidbit of funniness... Like I said earlier, I had a precancerous mole removed a long time ago, and the scar is like a round dot. Very faint, hardly know it's there. This new scar is like a short line. Still noticeable, but fading. Being a dork, I looked up the Morse Code to see if a dot and a dash represented a letter, and if so, what letter. You know what it represents? 

An "A." My first name starts with A. The coincidence is very interesting. 

Morse Code for the letter "A"

So, if you're a moley person like me, or you have that one weird bump that you keep meaning to check out, please please please use this silly blog post as the wake-up call you need to go get checked out. It's probably nothing. If it's something, they'll slice it off. And if it's something something, better to catch it now than ten years from now when it's too late to fix. 

I'm so TIRED

Guys, I know, I know...

I just had a happy, cheerful post a few weeks ago, but I gotta be Debbie Downer again...

I am just so tired... 

2023 started out well. Finished Celebration Half-Marathon (though there were some issues that weekend). Finished Gasparilla 15k and 8k. But everything kinda went downhill from there. 

Hubby hurt himself at Aquatica. 

I DNF'd at Gate River Run. 

Our refrigerator died. 

Our water lines needed replacement. 

Our sink drain pipes needed replacement. 

I had to take care of Steve the Cyst.

Hubby had appendicitis and appendectomy.

I had to have my Epidermoid Cyst completely removed. 

I had to have a precancerous mole removed. 

I got a nail in my tire and had to drop $250 on a new tire. 

And, AND...

Just last week, we had to have a tech come out and fix our AC (that is less than 10 years old). 

I know that the Lord only gives us what He knows we can handle, but Lord... please, I beg of you... can you give me some breathing room? 

I'm broke. I'm tired. 

I just want to simply exist for a while. 

We're Gonna FLY!

How about a happy post? I've been quite the Debbie Downer this year, and I need something happy to look forward to!

We're gonna FLY!!

Okay, let me back up...

Like many people, Hubby is afraid of flying. He's almost 50, hasn't been on a plane since he was a tiny kiddo. Me, the last time I flew was as a teenager in 1993, when we went from Florida to NYC. I remember liking flying, though I'm sure flying in 1993 was a lot different than it will be now!

Anyway, last year, when The Kiddo came to visit for Christmas, she flew home from Wisconsin. She, similar to her father, has a fear of heights, so flying had always been out of the question for either of these humans. I'd resigned myself to never being able to vacation anywhere where we had to fly to get there. Well, I guess Hubby felt a little... I dunno, intimidated isn't the word, but I can't find what I'm trying to say... Kind of "Hell, if she can do it, I can do it too!" 

Now, why is this important? Well, there's a little event happening next spring, across the country, from Texas to Vermont. A Total Solar Eclipse, in April 2024. There's an Annular Solar Eclipse in October 2023, but from what I'm reading, a Total is the best kind because it gives you this cool white light around the sun that you can see without glasses on. Oh yeah, that's what I want to see.. and try to photograph! 

2017 Total Solar Eclipse (via NASA)

But all the places to see it are more than a day's drive away, and some of the best places to see it are even further than that. So with Hubby's newfound bravery, we've decided that we're going to fly somewhere to view this eclipse!! 

Right now, I'm thinking either the Austin, Texas area, or the Poplar Bluff, Missouri area. Both are big city areas near large airports, that will give us plenty of options for VRBO/AirBnBs to book. They're near a lot of areas we want to visit. It's really a decision of if we want 'desert' (yes, I know Austin isn't desert), or 'mountains.'

We'll kick around ideas, see what other things we want to do, see what types of VRBOs are available, and what we can afford. 

No matter what, though, we're getting on an airplane and FLYING somewhere!!! 

Anybody know how to book a flight on TransAmerican? 

An Upside of Appendicitis? I Can Run This Race! - Memorial Day 5k 2023

It's been a weird spring, y'all! Right now, I'm dealing with Steve the Cyst and a Hubby recuperating from having an appendectomy. He's doing much better now, thank you to everyone who has reached out to ask about him. 

I realized a few days after his surgery that, since he would be off of work, I would be able to run the Orange Park Memorial Day 5k this year! Usually I either have to skip it (since it starts so early) or he has to take the day off. But he's already off! So, yes, I paid the whole $45 race fee, donned my most patriotic gear, and drove up to Jacksonville to run with a thousand of strangers.

 

Ready to run... well, walk!

Really an uneventful 5k. Seriously, I went back through my camera roll and it's just a bunch of crowd shots, and then a cat in the middle of the road. Everyone stopped to pet the cat, who refused to move. 

Pet here for power

I finished, sweaty, with a time of 56:06. I was 662nd out of 688 total runners. And look what I got!!!

Something looks... off?

Yes, that says Finiser. It's a Finiser medal. 

Row after row of Finiser Medals

The thing that's so funny is that I never noticed it at the time. Held it up, took photos. Took a photo of the table full of medals. Hung my medal from my rearview mirror as I drove around town. Nope, didn't notice it until later that night when I was cleaning up my camera roll. 

Anyway, me and my finiser medal headed over to a local donut shop, Daily Donuts, for a half-dozen donuts. The Maple Donut was delicious, with a good yeasty chew to it. 

Blueberry Cake, Maple Frosted, White Cream Filled (x2)
Chocolate Frosted, Glazed

I popped over to Sam's Club for some groceries, then wandered around JCPenney at Orange Park mall for a while, but I was starving so it was time for lunch. I'd heard good things about Brewer's Pizza, which is a part of Pinglehead Brewing Company. It was dark inside, and felt like a good "hole in the wall" pizza joint. There was a large group in the middle that had just played in a Pickleball Tournament nearby, and listening to them chit chat just really annoyed me. I hate to say it, but they all sounded so rich, entitled, and overly "we're better than you." Every one of them seemed to have a special request for their pizza, or demanded something extra during their meal. Like, come on people... I just want to order my pizza before I eat my own foot over here! 

I ordered something called a Florida Smacker; a personal deep-dish pizza, with pepperoni. Because of the large group, it took a while for my Smacker to get to me, but damn, it was worth it! It looked similar to a Little Caesar's lunch pizza, but it was worlds apart, in terms of taste and quality. It had that delicious greasy, tomatoey, spiciness to it that a good pepperoni pizza should have, with a thick and chewy crust, with toasted cheese edges. I was able to eat 3 of the 4 pieces, and I cannibalized the final slice, eating the toppings, because I needed the calories. 

Pepperoni Florida Smacker... sooooo good!

(ETA: Sad to hear, they closed in November 2023... They just couldn't recover after stupid Covid restrictions and the aftermath).

On the way out of town, I hit up Old Time Pottery, grabbed a soda for the road, then headed home. 

What Does an Appendix DO, Anyway? Besides Hurt?

Back in mid-May, Hubby was having a hard time... He complained of being really gassy. He wondered if it was just gas from hell, like when you need to fart but you just can't? Maybe it was constipation? He was just kind of miserable all day. He came to bed Wednesday night still complaining of these gas pains and an upset stomach, and they got worse throughout the night. There was a lot of cussing, vomiting, pooping, and writhing in pain. I'd ask him where the pain was and he never said that it was on his right side. He kept thinking that a massive poop would fix the pain. By three or four in the morning, he was just exhausted. He was muttering to himself and both of us were a little punch-drunk from lack of sleep. I finally fell asleep around 4, but he didn't get any sleep.  

I woke back up around 7am or so, and bless his heart, he was pale, sweating, and looked like death. I told him it was time to go to a doctor. And my husband, who generally hates doctors, immediately agreed with me. I got him dressed, packed a bag with my tablet, a book, some snacks (just in case we were there for a while), and decided to take him to a local Urgent Care Center. Again, we were still under the impression that he has a pooping problem, nothing more. 

So we got to the UCC and when we hobbled in, there's probably 10 people in the waiting room, and the nurses all looked completely frazzled. Turns out that their computers were down and they couldn't do anything. So we left, and headed to another UCC up the road. I turned into the wrong location, and I realized that I was at an ancillary ER. I debated leaving to go to the UCC, but something told me insurance costs be damned, take him to the ER. 

The lobby was empty so we were able to check in quickly. He peed in a cup and they took him back to a bed, put him in a gown, and got him hooked up on all the machines. I got a peek at the cup, and dear god, it looked like Amber Ale beer... It was way too dark, and I started to get really worried. (I mean, I'd been worried since about midnight, but this looked really bad, just sitting there). 

They gave him IV fluids, and some morphine (the Morphine, the better!) to lessen the pain, and he just relaxed a bit until one of the doctors came in to physically check him out. When they pressed on his right side, he realized that it hurt, and that was a big clue... It's probably appendicitis! Later, they swapped out the morphine for Dilaudid, which worked much better for him. 

Well, he got a CT scan done and yep, appendicitis. It was time to transfer him to The Big Hospital so that he could be admitted for an appendectomy. He got to ride in an ambulance, but I had to drive over myself, since I had the car. As I was pulling out, I saw the ambulance pulling out of the other exit, and... y'all... I lost it. I didn't plan to. I waved at the ambulance and said, please take care of him, and then I was gone. I think the stress and worry from the past 18 hours caught up with me, and I was just sobbing in the car. And I wasn't thinking straight because I actually thought that I could make better time to The Big Hospital via surface street shortcuts, than could the ambulance. So they went toward the interstate while I went toward the shortcuts. The only issue is that I turned the wrong way on the shortcut road, and was 5 miles out of my way in the wrong way before I realized where I was! So I doubled back, got on the interstate (like I should have in the first place), and went about 90mph to the hospital's exit. 

Parking was hellacious, and I think I found a spot about a quarter-mile away in a parking garage. I was practically running to the ER entrance, lol. When I got inside, holy crap! It looked like some sort of refugee camp. Now, I'll leave politics and social commentary aside, mostly, but damn, people... ERs are NOT where you go for primary care! Even if you're broke! Don't come to the ER because you have a splinter, then bitch because you've been there for 6 hours... there are actual emergencies that need to be taken care of before we can get the splinter out of your fingie, okay?

Anyway, I waited at a lobby window for about 10 minutes until it was my turn, only to be told I had to go to a different window for a Visitor Pass, since he was already in the ER. Twenty minutes later, I finally found him, parked in a bed that was just sitting against the wall in a hallway. The Big Hospital is a Level 1 Trauma Center (yeah, it's a good hospital), which is amazing, but that also means that there's never enough space for everyone in the ER. He was in good spirits, full of Dilaudid, and not feeling much pain at all. He'd already talked with one of the ER doctors, who explained what the next steps were. He would be held in the ER until such time as a room could be secured for him and he could be admitted to the hospital. At that point, he would relax until it was time for surgery. The doctor was patient with him, answering all of his questions, and putting him at ease. I'm so thankful for this doctor, being so patient and so caring!

Making the best of a miserable situation

We were in the ER for a few hours before his room was ready, and then he was wheeled upstairs. He got in bed, all wired up again, and napped on and off, while I was able to get comfy(ish) on the funky recliner in the room. I watched TV for a while, using Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy! to keep a sense of normalcy happening for me. I munched on some snacks, enjoyed some hospital ice, and worked on the outline for this blog post. 

What Is Appendicitis, Alex?

Every few hours they'd come in to check his vitals, and at 2am, it was finally his turn for surgery. I gave him kisses and watched him leave, and then I headed out myself. I drove home to check on the cat, and to get fresh clothes for both of us. On the way back, I got... dinner?... breakfast?... at Checkers. I thanked God for stoners at that moment, for keeping Checkers in business so that they can be open at 2:30 in the morning for a starving, stressed-out, distraught middle-aged woman to get French fries and a vanilla milkshake. 

Yum, midnight french fries!

Since it was almost 3am when I got back, I got a great parking spot, right outside of the building he was in! I went back up to our floor, but found a sitting area to finish my food - I didn't want him to return to a room that smelled like greasy food. Once I ate, I got a refill of that good hospital ice and headed back to the room. I straightened it up, just like a good little wifey, lol. I wanted the room to be warm and calming for when he came back. 

I think he was wheeled back in about 4am. Earlier, I'd asked about recovery, and they said I could come down, or I could just stay here. Apparently, I'd forgotten all about that! The orderly returning him to me said that when he woke up he was asking about me and was bummed that I wasn't there... oof, my heart. I felt so bad! 

For the next few hours, we slept (him much better than me, as you can imagine) in the dark, except for the few times they came in to check vitals. He was woken up around 8am for breakfast, and this man ate hospital food like it was the finest Michelin Star cuisine. (I tasted some of it, and it was as bad as I remember it being, the last time I had hospital food). About 2 hours later, he was released to go home. We had to wait a little bit to pick up some pain meds from the pharmacy downstairs, though. We walked - slowly - to the car (so close, thanks to that 3am adventure), and drove home. We crawled into bed and crashed for a few hours, holding hands and rubbing each others arms (cuddling was off-limits, obviously!). 

Future Lazy Here!

Both of us had the forethought to notify our supervisors about what was happening, so I was able to work from home the rest of the week, and he put in for a short-term Leave of Absence to recover. He works for a very large company, and anything like this is handled by a 3rd party company. What absolute aggravation to fill out these forms, and wait for the company to do what they need to do, all while also waiting for the ER doctors fill out authorization and return to work forms... He was feeling well enough to go back to work by the end of May, but it took forever for the company to get their shit together. I think he was finally back full-time by the end of JUNE! That blew our budget all to hell, but I'm happy to say that by moving things around, we never had to play the "Lights or Groceries?" game. Made me feel like a true grown-up. 

What else made me feel like a grown-up? Getting the bills... shudder.

Sticker price for this was $46,839! But after insurance and adjustments ($-40,946), our out-of-pocket cost is only $5,892.26.

LOL... only $6,000. The bill was in two parts; one for the surgery and stay, the other for the ER. I was able to pay for the surgery and stay over a month or two, but the ER (the bigger of the two) kind of just sat there and mocked me. Eventually, I had the smartest idea! Set up a payment plan of a manageable amount per month, pay it with a credit card that earns cash rewards, then pay off that credit card every month. So, I am currently paying about $200 a month, basically interest-free, and earning $5 for each payment. There's no rush to pay it off early, because there's no penalty, so I'm just letting it ride, on auto-pay, until 2025. 

I can hear you, by the way, asking me... So, what does the appendix DO anyway? Well, let me educate you! 

The appendix is a worm-shaped tube attached to the large intestine of the human body. Modern researchers believe that the appendix helps to protect the body's internal environment from infection. Historically, it was thought that the appendix had no function, evolutionary theories believe it might have played a role in digestion. A great deal of evidence suggests that it is a vestigial or evolutionary remnant, which means that it used to serve a specific purpose, though it doesn't now. Several biologist support the theory that it was used by our herbivorous ancestors, as those people had a comparatively larger appendix, and it helped to digest tough herbivorous foods like tree bark. As we evolved and began to eat more easily digestible foods, the appendix lost its function. Some scientists believe that, in time, it will eventually disappear completely from the human body. 

In recent years, research has shown that the appendix has lymphoid cells, which helps the body fight infections; this suggests that the appendix also plays a role in the immune system, producing early defenses that help prevent serious infections in humans.

Other researchers believe that it produces and stores good microbes for the human gut. When good microbes are flushed out from the body, during times of dysentery or cholera, the appendix releases it's stock of "good bacteria" and reboots our digestive system. The fact that the appendix is located at the lower part of the large intestine through which food and microbes pass supports this theory of restocking the microbial flora of the digestive system. 

It's been a year since his appendectomy, and for the most part, he's healed perfectly fine. His procedure was laparoscopic, so there were three entry points: On his left side, his belly button, and in the crease between his pubic area and stomach. I can no longer see any scar in his belly button or crease, and just a faint one on his left side. He sporadically feels some pain there, we're not sure why. My assumption is that his muscles are just knitting back together; he also sat a lot during recovery, and he probably needs to stretch that area out, honestly! Once in a while, he has a hard time picking up or moving heavy objects (like big cases of bottled water, for instance), but that is rare. It's to the point that it's just something that happened last year, and he's moved on from it. 

We've knocked out about 75% of the medical bills; I think we have about $1,500 left to pay, and like I said, it's on auto-pay and I don't have to think about it. It auto-pays with a credit card that gives me rewards, so I'm making my money work for me! 

I hate that this episode made me think about our mortality. Yes, we know we're no spring chickens, and that, at some point, we'll have to deal with things like illness or surgeries. But dammit, I thought I'd have another decade before some sort of emergency happened. I was more worried about how to talk this doctor-hater into a prostate exam and colonoscopy! 

But until that happens, I will snuggle him and cuddle him and love him every single day. I want to have at least 40 more years with this man, and I want him as healthy as possible. 

Is Your Refrigerator Running? Mine's Not.

Last week, I noticed that my morning OJ wasn't as cold as it should be. Huh, weird. I threw an ice cube into it and sat down to enjoy my morning. 

The next day, I noticed that the OJ was fizzy... I assumed it'd gone bad, but I go through it so quickly, how was that possible? 

Then I looked at the half-gallon of milk in the door and noticed that there was a weird blue line around the container, and it looked... chunky. 

I stuck my face in the fridge and thought that it felt a little warmer than it should, so I cranked the thermostat down (up?) to 9, the coldest setting possible. Surely that'll fix it, right? 

The next day, it was still kinda warm in there; I started getting curiously worried and more frustrated. I researched why a fridge would be warm like that and got a few typical answers: broken Condenser Fan or Motor, dirty coils, broken Evaporator Fan, broken Damper, and even just overloaded/blocked freezer vents. On Friday, I moved stuff around in the freezer, and did discover some blocked vents, but it didn't seem to make much of a difference. The meat thermometer I stashed in the fridge said it was still 52º in there. That's not good...

While I was at parkrun on Saturday, chitchatting with one of the other volunteers, I told him that I wasn't sure if I should fix my fridge or get a new one; he asked how old my current fridge was and he was shocked when I said we got it in 2003 (that's 20 years old!)… Maybe I should just get a new one? 

Here she is in all her warm glory... 2003 GE Fridge

I went home and did a full reorganization of both kitchen and upright freezers, mostly to see if I could find any more blockages, but also because I was overdue for a full inventory anyway (full inventories suck, but they always unearth a treasure or two for future dinners!) Sadly, I had to get rid of a lot of stuff that had gone bad, like milk, cheese, and even some otherwise-edible leftovers. 

Unfortunately, it didn't make any difference. I decided that cleaning the coils and fixing the damper were two things that I could do, so I ordered a damper from Amazon and cleaned the coils (did nothing). The damper was easy to replace, but that didn't fix anything either. Luckily, I could return it for a full refund. 

By Monday, I threw up my hands and resigned myself to buying a new fridge. I didn't want to spend hundreds on more parts, plus labor (cuz we all know I can only do so much), only to be told that the whole fridge is trashed. I was sad, because this fridge was a housewarming present from my parents when we moved in to this house, the way that our old stove (RIP White Stove) was a gift from my grandmother (who passed just a few years later). When we get rid of this fridge, there will be no "New Homeowner" stuff left... it feels like we're True Grown-Ups, at 45! 

I did some fridge comparison shopping on my lunch break, agonizing over so many different choices! All I knew for sure is that I didn't want a Top Fridge nor did I want a Bottom Fridge. I'm a Side-By-Side Gal for life!  I ended up, again and again, returning to a GE side-by-side that seemed to offer every single thing that I wanted! And after looking long and hard at it I realized why I liked it so much! It was basically the granddaughter of the fridge I already have! She got a little glow-up, with extra drawers, glass shelves in the freezer, etc. 

I went to Lowe's after work to physically look at fridges, especially the one I was wanting; you just never really know if it's the right one until you touch it and manipulate it in real space! Also, I wanted to eyeball spaces with bins and baskets (since that's how I organize my freezer*). 

Sterilite 16qt bin $7.48 - fits nicely in the freezer!

Double up the storage with two 6qt Lowe's bins, $2.48 each
(or $1.98 Sterilite at Home Depot)

Maximize vertical storage with multiple stacking wire baskets

They only had the 25.3cf version (the exact dupe of what I have now), but I wanted to check out the slightly upgraded 25.1cf model. On a whim, I went over to Home Depot to see if they had it on the floor (the internet said they had it on display, and we all know it has to be true if they put it on the internet, bonjour!). It was there, and so I was able to compare both the 25.3 and the 25.1, and that's where the problems started... 

I just kept going back and forth about which one was better... Did I need the extra bins in the freezer? Did the deli drawer take up too much space? Should I settle for the dupe, but then regret not getting the fancier version later? Ahhhhhhh! I took way too many photos (that I will probably never reference again) and even made a video of me talking to myself about the pros and cons of each option! If anyone was around, they probably thought I was insane. In the end, I kind of just shut down all discussion, told myself, "But the nicer one, dumbass," and walked away. 

Freezer has 3 shelves and 2 pull-out bins
Fridge has 4 shelves and 3 pull-out drawers

After a fully unsatisfactory dinner from Subway (seriously, two pieces of roast beef on my 6"? for seven bucks?), I ordered my new fridge. I chose Lowe's, because I have $80 in paint rebates from when we re-did the living area, I could use Rakuten to get 1% cash back on my purchase, AND I saved 5% by using my Lowe's Credit Card (don't worry, I moved money around and paid it off pretty much instantly, so all my savings I just listed didn't get negated by interest!)

The best part is that they will deliver it on Wednesday. The worst part is that we have to clean out the kitchen so that they can deliver it on Wednesday. They'll need to have room to install the water line for the ice maker, and currently, that water line snakes it's way behind a shelf and under two cabinets... So we have to clear all of that out for them. Then tomorrow night after work, we'll need to take everything out of the freezer (that still works just fine) and put it into coolers. I'm hopeful that we can reorganize our upright freezer to make room for some of the more important stuff like steak and chicken. I mean, if the ice cream melts, it's no big deal, but I don't want to lose 20 pounds of chicken breasts and steak! And we'll need to take everything still viable out of the fridge, like bottled water and cans of soda. I think it's time to chuck the French Onion Dip and eggs, though... (Thank God tonight is trash night... I threw away so much stuff!)

Old Freezer with 4 shelves and one bin (notice the organization!)
Old Fridge with 4 shelves and two drawers (yes, that's a lot of drinks)

Clover will lick anything with condensation on it!

A sad and forlorn dinosaur awaits her replacement

Can I just complain a minute about this kitchen...
There is a light switch right by that shelf. There's no way to reach that! We had to install a ceiling fan so that we could just turn that light on when we needed light... Ugh, old homes, am I right?

On Wednesday, my beautiful new fridge showed up, and I left the installers alone to do their thing. They had everything installed in about 15 minutes, but unfortunately, they couldn't install the water line! The line I purchased was too short to reach from the back of the fridge to the sink (it has to go around a corner, so I should have purchased a 25-ft hose, whoops). I told the installer that I could do the water line myself the next day and to not worry about it. They turned the water back on, cleaned up, and left. Hubby and I took turns peeling off all of the tape and plastic and removing all of the little stickers and Styrofoam pieces and then left it alone to come down to temperature. I made a quick run over to Lowe's to return the short water line and buy a bigger one. 

A few hours later, I went in to the kitchen to start dinner, and when I tried to wash my hands, no water came out of the tap. 

Huh, guess they forgot to turn the water back on. No problem, I crawled under the cabinet and spun the spigot.

Still no water... 

That's not good. 

Righty tighty, lefty loosy... Yeah, they had turned the water back on, and I'd just turned it off. So I turned it back on again... Nothing from the tap. Not even a tiny drip or trickle.  

We dealt with it that night (woo hoo, no dishes tonight!), and the next day, I started calling around to plumbers. I got lucky with a company which I won't name, for reasons you'll see in a minute. They were able to send someone out within an hour of the call. 

When he got there (let's call him "Bob"), he looked at my pipes and made that noise, you know, that hissing intake of breath that indicates that shit's gonna get really expensive real quick? Yeah... that noise. See, my home was built in 1956. She's old. She's tired. And she has galvanized pipes that are old enough to draw Social Security. And when these pipes get really old, they begin to crumble from the inside out. So, most likely, the pipes have a bunch of crud built up and that's what's causing the blockage. And like a sand castle, the minute you touch them, they may just crumble. When that happens, you have to chase the pipe until you get to solid pipe, which could be many feet of pipe. And many hundreds of dollars. 

Just for shits & giggles, I asked him for a spitball estimate to repipe the entire house. He said he thought it'd run about $10,000. Just to run new lines from our laundry room to the kitchen, via external pipes, would be $1200. Luckily, he was an amazing human, and told me that the company he works for is very expensive, and he would do this freelance for $750. I was a little hesitant because, yes, it sounded shady and unethical, but I also wanted to save $700. I decided to take a chance, made a handshake deal, and he said he'd come back the next day.

Sure enough, he came by after work the following afternoon, with another company employee who also freelances. They ran new plumbing from my laundry room pipes, underground in front of the house, and up into the kitchen wall. It's a bit ugly, but I don't care. 

And just like that I have water again! Super water pressure! Hot as fuck water! Man, I didn't realize how slow our water lines were until we got good water lines back. He also hooked up the fridge water line for free, with his own water line, and told me to return the one I bought the other day (so there's another $40 savings!)

The next few days were nice, having scaldingly-hot water to do dishes in, but I noticed that the right side of the sink was draining slowly. So I pulled out the plunger and went to town. At first nothing was moving, and then finally, movement. 

POV Looking up at the pipes and the bottom of the sink

And a sound. 

Like a waterfall. 

Under my sink. 

Yeah... those pesky galvanized pipes again. I plunged so hard that the pipe sprung a leak and hosed down my (now clean and organized) under-sink cabinets with disgusting dishwater. 

So I pulled everything back out and called Bob again. He came over the following day and ran all new PVC pipes to the existing copper pipes in the wall, installed new strainer baskets (those little crisscrosses in the sink drains), and even installed my new kitchen faucet while he was there, all for $250. What a deal! 

I put the cabinets back together... again... and knock on wood, we're fucking DONE this time!!! 

2023 sucks. 

In case anyone is interested, 

here is how I organize my fridge and freezer:

Freezer Organization

• Top shelf: Butter
• Second shelf: More butter (yes, I know... I'm a baker), plus a few frozen dinners
• Third shelf: Frozen chicken, in meal-size portioned Ziplocs, corralled in plastic storage tubs (like the Sterilite, shown above)
• Fourth shelf: Frozen steak, ground beef, and other meats, in portioned Ziplocs, in plastic storage tubs
• Top pull-out bin: Homemade frozen meals (like casseroles), for easy access
• Bottom pull-out bin: Meal components, like diced meat, shredded cheese, etc
• Doors: Frozen juice boxes (wine alternatives for cooking), Irish butter (yes, yes, I can hear you), ice packs, Instant yeast, and other various stuff that has no home. 

Fridge Organization

• Top shelf: Hubby's beverages, larger insulated water bottles for when I run
• Second shelf: Condiments, leftovers, etc
• Third shelf: Deep fryer machine, taller bottles or beverages
• Fourth shelf: Margarine (I like it for box pasta meals), extra OJ, lunchmeat
• First drawer: Canned Pepsi (Migraine Deterrent!) and restaurant condiment cups
• Second drawer: Eggs, bin to hold all manor of cheese (cream, string, snack, shred)
• Bottom drawer: Overflow beverage storage (mostly bottled water)
• Doors: Typical fridge stuff, of course! Milk, OJ, condiments, etc; that weird bottom shelf that is super-shallow holds a tube of Pillsbury Orange Rolls perfectly, as well as Reddi-Whip!

Gate River Redemption Plan for 2024

So, last month, I participated in, and had to quit, the Gate River Run 15k in Jacksonville, due to some wonky muscle issues along the right side of my body (my massage therapist said I was really locked up and it was very smart of me to quit). 

I spent the rest of the month basically having a pity party for myself. I only went to the gym 5 days this month. I only did one parkrun (volunteered at the rest). I only did one solo run at the park, last Sunday. Okay, okay, part of that was actual rest and recuperation for my wonky muscle issues, but most of it was a pity party.

But I've been fomenting an idea that, I think, will be beneficial for me, not only to get that Gate River Run medal in 2024, but to just set me on a good path in all physical activities. 

I modified my already-existing weekly exercise plan, and added it some goals to hit. 

I call it... Gate River Redemption (or "Fuck that Monster")

Mondays will be at-home treadmill days, utilizing Couch to 5k. I'll do Day One of each Week, as laid out in the C25k app. When I "graduate" C25k (after 8 weeks), I'll start over and aim to get faster each round. 

Tuesdays will be Leg day at the gym, with 5-10 minutes of cardio Warmup and Cooldown. 

Wednesdays will remain my Rest Day. 

Thursdays will be at-home treadmill days, utilizing Couch to 5k, doing Day Two of each Week.

Fridays will be Upper Body day, with cardio.

Saturdays will be parkrun (participating or volunteering), followed by Back/Core day at the gym, then stretching and yoga via YouTube or PeerFit at home. 

Sundays will be my solo walk/run days, outside, (no matter the weather), to include Couch to 5k Day Three. When I get within 'training distance' of races, this day will be my Long Run Day, with training walk/runs up to 14 miles. 

For my goals, I made a handful for three different categories:

Race Goals:

• Finish a 5k under 40 minutes (current PR is 47:08)
• Finish Gasparilla 8k under 1:15 (current PR is 1:23)
• Finish a 10k under 1:30 (current PR is 1:32)
• Finish Gate River Run 2024 under 2:30 (current PR is 2:37)

Strength Goals:

• Hold a Plank for 2 minutes (Bonus: Hold for 5 minutes)
• Do 20 Push-Ups (no time limit, within reason)
• Do 25 Crunches in 1 minute
• Wall-sit for 1 minute
• Take Progress Photos every single week

Flexibility Goals:

• Do a forward split (both legs)
• Touch my toes from standing, and from sitting
• Do 20 inches in a Sit & Reach Test
• Do a Full Pigeon Pose (both legs)
• Clasp hands behind back between shoulder blades (both arms)
• Take progress photos of splits, toes, pigeon, and hands, every single week

I think that these are smart and do-able, but I also know me... if I hit 50 to 75% of these goals, I'll be more than thrilled with myself. Like, maybe I can't do a forward split, but I can do a full Pigeon Pose, I'll call that a win, and then move the split goal to next year. 

Tomorrow is a new month, which means tomorrow is a new day, and a new opportunity to do new things. 

Let's get it done!!!! That monster will not beat me in 2024.

This is the Year I Get LASIK!!!

After debating about it for a few years, I finally decided it's time to take care of my eyes. I originally kicked around the idea of doing it in 2022, but the money wasn't there. When doing my Annual Enrollment at work for 2023, I upped my monthly contribution to my FSA (Flexible Spending Account) as high as comfortably possible so that I'd have the majority of the cost just sitting there waiting for me. 

I spent the first few months of 2023 debating whether I should have the procedure done locally, or if I should take advantage of "coupons" available through my health insurance; I could save up to $1000 IF I got the Super Mega Lasik at Eyeballs 'r' Us... you know the typical deal I'm talking about. 

The issue was two-fold. How expensive is the Super Mega Lasik? And Eyeballs 'r' Us only had offices in metropolises like Tampa, Miami, and Orlando. Was it worth driving to Orlando to go to the big office, to save a possible $1000? And places never give you any idea of what costs are like, so I didn't even know if Super Mega Lasik would cost $5,000 per eye, or anything like that! 

So I made the decision to visit the local office first, Gainesville Eye Associates, to get a better understanding of everything, and then decide if I should get a second consultation at Eyeballs 'r' Us. 

I took some time off of work and went over there by myself. Hubby had to work and since it was just a consult, I didn't think it was anything he needed to go to. They tested my eyes with just about every machine they had, and I got the all-clear that even with my astigmatism in my right eye, I was a good candidate for Lasik!!

I asked the nurse (are they nurses if it's not, like a regular doctor's office? Are they iNurses, haha?) her opinion on why I should get it done here instead of Eyeballs 'r' Us. She said that GEA has been in town for decades, they've done thousands of procedures, and treatment here is caring and personal. Just from the 20 minutes I was there, I understood the "caring and personal" claim... everyone was just so nice!

She told me that to have both eyes done would be $3,600. That included the pre-op appointment, the procedure, and four follow-up appointments at one day, one week, one month, and three months post-op. I choked a little when I got the price, I won't lie, but after thinking about it, it didn't seem that bad. A single eye doctor appointment could be $100, so there's $500 right there. 

And once I knew that there needed to be multiple follow up appointments, I knew that staying in town was the smartest idea. If we went to Eyeballs 'r' Us, we'd need a hotel the night before and after, plus gas to and from, for five trips. And we'd both have to miss work, wasting precious Vacation Time we wanted to use for other things. 

So it's a no-brainer. I'm going to stay in town and go to the local guy for my Lasik.

I'm hoping for around June 2023, because there won't be a lot of work stuff to deal with, and I can afford the time off to recover for a few days. 

I'm getting Lasik!!!!! 

If you made it past Kermit, here's a joke for you...

How many eye doctors does it take to change a lightbulb?

One… or two? One? ……..or Two?