I've worked for my current employer for 13 years, and I never get to go to any out-of-town conferences or trainings or anything like that. Frankly, it made me feel a little undervalued. Other staff were able to go to conferences at least 2-3 times per year, with no one batting an eye, but for me...? It was always like pulling teeth to get permission, or to get money from the budget, so I just stopped even requesting to go anywhere at all.
However, because my boss retired last year, and I assumed some of his duties, that meant that there was one symposium that I had to go to, no matter what! I was stoked. I felt like a grown-ass adult, with a grown-ass job, with grown-ass responsibilities.
And it was at Disney World! Okay, okay, so it was more like Disney-adjacent, but still! It was held at Signia by Hilton Orlando Bonnet Creek (ooooh, so fancy!) I brought hubby with me, too, although he didn't have to come to any of the meetings or trainings, of course.
So, we drove down Monday night before it started and got our room (upgraded to a King room, too) and spent the majority of the afternoon chillin' out, unpacking, and trying to decide on dinner.
Going through Google, we discovered a place called Twin Peaks. It looked like a lumberjack-themed Hooters, but it was so kitschy, and this dessert was so amazingly on-point, we just had to go! (Part of the decision also came from the fact that we'd had the giggles for 20 minutes, and weren't making any adult decisions at the moment).
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| I mean... come on, right? |
Needless to say, it was as bad as you'd think it was. I talked myself into an 'appetizer' called "Billionaire's Bacon", which was thick-cut bacon coated in brown sugar, smoked paprika, and chili flakes (it was good, but seriously... $8 for three strips of bacon?), then we split a plate of Mozzarella Cheese Bites (cubes of mozzarella coated in Panko bread crumbs... huh?) and a plate of Chicken Fingers with Fries.
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| Is it called Billionaire's Bacon because they get rich off of unsuspecting diners? |
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| Were these even fried, or were they baked? |
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| Standard frozen fingers and plain ol' fries |
Tuesday was a very long day for me, with a huge welcome conference in the morning before breaking for lunch. The plan was to leave the hotel for lunch, but when we got to the parking garage, my tire was flat!
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| This tire was only about 4 months old, y'all... 2023 strikes again |
There was some construction in the parking garage, and I (of course!) had the luck of running over a freakin' nail. With no time to deal with it now, we trudged back to the hotel and headed over to the pool bar for lunch instead. We both ended up ordering from the Kid's Menu (because we weren't all that hungry, we are that cheap, and the waiter didn't give a shit). He had sliders and I had chicken fingers; both meals were delicious and the perfect size.
The rest of the afternoon included more trainings and break-out sessions. I was also developing a pretty gnarly migraine at this point, probably from my lack of caffeine. At the end of the evening, back in our room, we acted like mature adults... and ordered more Kid's Meals via Room Service! I was impressed though, it was still really nicely presented! Our plates were cloched, with real silverware and linen napkins, two goblets of ice water, and condiments came in tiny little bottles or cups. I felt very fancy eating my sub-par hot dog (should've gone with the sliders).
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| Yes, we are adults who order Hot Dogs from Room Service |
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| It was hot and fresh, I'll give 'em that! |
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| So cute and tiny |
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| The ranch is spectacular |
On Wednesday, I was free for the majority of the day, so we slept in, then I called AAA to come fix the tire. Because it is unsafe to drive highway speeds on the spare (donut) tire, we drove over to University Nissan to buy a new tire. They took forever! I think we were there over two hours, for a simple tire install. We'd skipped lunch (stupidly) because we thought it'd be a quick thing. By the time we left, around 5pm, I was ready to eat my own foot! So... bless his heart... Hubby suggested that we go over to Universal City Walk and have an early dinner at Toothsome Chocolate Emporium for dinner. I was up for it, because I was under the assumption that, after 6pm, parking was free at City Walk. And yeah, sometimes it is... But not when it's a Halloween Horror Night night. But since we were already there, we paid the insane $30 parking cost and parked. I can report, ladies and gentlemen, that "Halloween" for young women now means wearing fishnets, slutty outfits, and vintage tee shirts, while sporting brightly colored hair and too much makeup. Eh, I guess that's really what it's always been, I suppose. They all just looked so desperate and uncreative, like this huge crowd of LOOK AT ME girls who would punch anyone who actually, you know, looked at them.
The restaurant was busy, since HHN hadn't started yet. Lots of people who were either waiting to enter HHN, or parkgoers who had been herded out because they didn't have HHN tickets. We got a table on the 2nd floor after about a 10 minute wait. Hubs ordered the Cheddar Bacon burger, and I got the Southern Fried Chicken BLT (without the L or T). Both were delicious, but I think that mine was better.
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| Cheddar Bacon Burger & Fries |
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| Southern Fried Chicken B(-LT) Sandwich & Fries |
For dessert, as if we weren't full enough to begin with, we split a "That's 'Mint'" milkshake featuring Andes mints, shaved chocolate, whipped cream, a chocolate-dipped rim, and a full-size mint chip ice cream sandwich! It was overkill, for sure, but damn, was it delicious!
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| Plastic spoons and paper straws... $17 |
We fought over the ice-cream sandwich, which looked like a giant Oreo (it is!) Two big cons to this dessert though (not even counting the $17 price tag); first is that they served it to us with plain, white, plastic spoons, and two, we could keep the souvenir jar, but they had no way to clean it, except to take it to the bathroom and wash it myself. I can only imagine what their pipes must look like after people dump their milkshakes down the drain! I was in there for about 10 minutes, melting the chocolate around the rim until I could rinse it away! Do better, Universal. Back at the hotel, we put on our suits and spent some time in the pool and hot tub, which was heavenly.
Thursday was my last day of the conference, and it was over by lunch time. We checked out of the hotel and went to Jason's Deli for lunch, then drove to our other hotel that we booked separately, so that we could extend this business trip into a long vacation weekend.
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| Ham & Cheese on White |
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| Massive Lunch-Size Chicken Alfredo Pasta |
Now, we've been to Typhoon Lagoon a few times, and at some point during this visit, I decided that I wanted to do every single {adult} ride they had. I didn't share this with Hubby until I was about halfway through the list, really. We started with a few laps around Castaway Creek, and then some of the rides we knew we loved, like Misadventure Falls and Gangplank Falls (our absolute fave). We did Keelhaul Falls and Mayday Falls, both of which suck, since we have to carry our own tubes up the stairs, but are still fun. We took a break with a few more laps on the lazy river where we just enjoyed each other's company, and I told him that I thought I was pretty close to doing all the rides. We pulled over at Crush'n Gusher so I could ride that (he didn't want to ride), then made our way across the park to the Storm Slides. And then, finally, I spent a few minutes just staring at Humunga Kowabunga. It was all that was standing between me and saying I did all the rides. HK is an "enclosed body slide" that drops at a 60º angle, 214 feet to the bottom. I grit my teeth and started the big climb (sadly, having to stop every little bit because the cardio was killing my lungs!) to the top. I put on my big girl panties, took a shaky breath, and I did it!! I did it!!!
Oooh, and I hated it!
As soon as I started, I got water in my face and I couldn't keep my eyes open, and so I couldn't tell when the end was coming, when to 'brace for impact,' so to speak. It was like hitting a wall, and this huge jet of water shot between my legs, and into the nether regions. I'm so very, very thankful for the little skirt on my bathing suit because I'm pretty sure I had a 180º wedgie from butt to belly! Ironically (or sadly?) just a day prior, there was a story in the New York Post about a woman suing Disney for her "Painful Wedgie" in 2019; she contends that near the end of the ride, she became airborne and as she was slammed downward against the slide, her legs became uncrossed, causing her swimsuit to be painfully forced between her legs and for water to be violently forced inside her." She also claimed to have suffered "severe lacerations, damage to her internal organs, and a hernia." The suit accuses Disney of negligence for not warning riders about the risks, nor did they provide her with "proper protective swimwear." I don't see any follow up to this lawsuit, so my guess is that it was dropped or settled to shut her up. But, man, I can see where she's coming from... that was a painful wedgie!
Feeling accomplished, we took a few victory laps in the lazy river then decided to head out around 4pm to get ahead of the crowds (park closed at 5). We filled our bellies with delicious burgers from Sickies Garage on US-192 then made the long drive home.
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| I think this was a BBQ Bacon Cheeseburger... can't remember! |
I'm not sure where the work conference will be next year - they always try to spread it out across the state, so it's fair to everyone - so I hope it's somewhere that I haven't been!
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